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What do I do when I'm not writing science fiction? Chances
are pretty good that I'm writing something else. And here are
some of those something elses.
Ten Steps to
Becoming a Science Fiction Writer
This is a speech I gave to the Philadelphia Science Fiction
Society in 2003. A few details have gotten whiskery in the
intervening years, but darn it, the advice is still solid. The
speech is also well-stocked with personal anecdotes and
insights, for those itching to know more about me. This may
well be the best thing I have ever written for no money.
Yes, that was a joke. Please feel free to laugh.
The Hardball Times
What did I do for all those years when I wasn't writing science fiction? I was still writing, just in another area: baseball. The Hardball Times was, in its day, one of the leading baseball websites, analyzing the National Pastime from statistical, historical, and cultural angles. I spent eight years among some great writers and editors, adding my own insights on the game, from studying Jackie Robinson's steals of home to suggesting revised playoff formats even wackier than what Commissioner Manfred was proposing. (Those were literally my first and last articles there.)
When Glorious Xi Jinping's Gift to a Grateful World shut down MLB in March 2020, The Hardball Times suspended publication, and when baseball woke back up, THT did not. While the site is starting to decay, you can still read most of what I wrote there, using this page as a portal. (Some daily contributions I made early in my run are no longer available.) I will nudge fans of Analog toward my early essay on Pete Rose, as Stanley Schmidt has a cameo role. For the rest, you have a wide selection ranging from deep analysis of abstruse aspects of the game to telling some fascinating tales from its rich history.
Hm. Story-telling and science. Not so surprising now that I got into this, is it?
WWWF
Grudge Match
1995 saw the birth of a website dedicated to fantasy fights
between pop-culture icons, played for laughs. It ran for ten
years, producing almost 250 matches, all archived on the site.
"But what does this have to do with you?", you ask--and I
answer, "I was one of their writers for seven of those years."
Yes, I'm not just smart, I'm funny, too. ;-)
But don't go over there just on my account. The brainchild
of Brian Wright and Steve Levine is great fun even when I'm
nowhere to be found. Not that I don't add my own strong dash
of humor when I'm working a match, usually with a lean toward
SF and fantasy. (My first official match as a commentator was
King
Kong vs. Godzilla, though I earlier did a guest stint on
Beakman
vs. Bill Nye the Science Guy.)
Such good times those were. We should do a gratuitous
reunion tour or something.
iRiffs
As was explained on the Links page,
Rifftrax is where several refugees from Mystery Science
Theater 3000 continue mocking movies for the delight of
their many fans. iRiffs was how they gave you -- and in this
context, "you" means "me" -- a chance to create your own
riffing commentaries, and make a buck from it. You'd record your
commentary to synch up with the movie or TV program of your
choice, upload it to iRiffs, and they put it up for sale at a
special section of the Rifftrax website -- along with the
literally hundreds of riffs that other amateurs have done.
Silly me, I went and did four of these things.
Okay, me and Paul Golba, one of my partners in mayhem from
the Grudge Match website I mentioned just a few inches
above. It's always good to have a partner who A) is funny and
B) can scrounge up recording equipment. Sadly, my move
to North Carolina ended this collaboration, and Rifftrax grew robust enough that the semi-pro section has been shuffled deep into the background of the site. They still sell the iRiffs, though.
As my comedic target, I chose Star Trek, the
landmark series that introduced me to science fiction as a
boy. Yep, payback time. Mike Nelson and his de-robotted
compadres have taken on five movies in the franchise, but
that's left plenty of ground for me to cover. Paul and I
tackled Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and Star
Trek: First Contact, as well as the Classic Trek episodes
"Amok Time" and "Mirror, Mirror."
(In addition, I co-wrote the riffing script for another
iRiffer, James "RoninFox" Cruise, when he and a partner did
their riff of Star Trek: The Motion Picture. A few years later, I contributed again, somewhat less this time, to his riff of Star Trek: Nemesis. His efforts
are, if anything, funnier than Paul's and mine.)
Be forewarned, movie riffing is not a perfectly
down-the-middle taste, as many who watched MST3K can
attest. My average iRiff will contain esoteric
references, wacky running gags, callbacks not only to official
Rifftrax but to the original series, and other bizarreness. It
will also have its share of references that were piping hot
when we recorded the riff, but have cooled off in the fullness
of time. (As the earlier MST3K episodes are now over thirty years old, it is not a risk unique to my efforts.) Your mileage, as is inevitable with comedy, may vary
-- but hopefully we'll give you enough laughs to make you
forget your worries.
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
(Release Date: November 20, 2007)
Classic Star Trek - Amok Time
(Release Date: November 21, 2008)
Classic Star Trek - Mirror, Mirror
(Release Date: December 13, 2008)
Star Trek: First Contact
(Release Date: July 10,
2009)
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